I thought I was missing something... I was hoping to get away from the transformer chip to simplify things / lower costs...
seems the cheapest jack I can find here is the following:
Bel Stewart MagJack SI-60002-F (no LED indicators)
of if you insist on the LED's - and want an easy to prototype option, check out sparkfun - RB-Spa-1054
I'll try make time to draw something up later, hopefully help a few other people out with similar needs that might be as new to this as I am